A Wife After God's Own Heart: Chapter 3

I've been taking my time before proceeding writing about the next chapter because I really want to digest the first 2 things that really matter in marriage: Your heart with God and your communication with your spouse. So I focused on applying at least 2 small things from each chapter, that is to read at least a chapter of my Bible everyday, and to pray for my husband going to work, at lunch, and on the way home. It was a struggle at first because I was used to worrying, but I quickly learned to transition to lift my thoughts and concerns to the Lord. And yesterday going home I felt a sort of peace. I just felt really calm and serene, something I haven't experienced in a while. 

And of course I also practiced keeping my mouth shut, speaking graciously and appreciating things he does, like cooking for us again yesterday. It really didn't much effort to show respect for your husband, but it took a lot of effort to really be quiet and listen to him first before I tell him about my day. But slowly, I see some small changes. Positive reactions. So, I'm going to keep this up.

Chapter 3: Learning to Communicate

As a wife, our words should be ...sweet...soft....suitable...scant....slow.

I don't want to sound like a constant dripping of water at home, which is the result of a contentious wife.

So I looked up Merriam to see what contentious means:

: likely to cause disagreement or argument 

: exhibiting an often perverse and wearisome tendency to quarrels and dispute.

Uh oh. Seems like a major overhaul is in order. So I would be practicing the art of silence. Since it says in

Proverbs 10:19 Sin is not ended by multiplying words but the prudent hold their tongues.

It seems so sad that I'm a speech communication major but I fail so drastically in communicating with my spouse. They certainly teach you what to say in schools, but not what NOT to say. 

The author suggested to Take it to the Lord in prayer like what Hannah did. No matter what I'm bitterness or trials I am going through, I want God to know everything. Actually, that's why David is also called A Man after God's own heart, because he was also so close and personal with the Lord that he bared all his emotions to God. 

The second suggestion is to Make a decision to "cut it out". Cut out the wrong, unproductive, destructive and negative thoughts and replace with noble ones. This is so in line with my new life verse. So whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. 

This new year, a lot of people may have vowed to make changes and resolutions. What is reality is that change doesn't happen when the clock strikes 12, it doesn't happen to you. It happens over a long period of time, of deciding to adjust and readjust, commit and recommit. I admit I myself find it hard to stick to something. I'm a fan of starting out strong but fail to see it through. I hope with the positive effects I am seeing with the relationship with my husband I can be inspired to continue and inspire others as well. 

I hope I get to review one book about marriage as well each month this year, along with my other goals for 2013. And with that I pray that my blog would light a hope for women who want to save their marriage, or who thought it was already dead. I thought mine was, but in between the ups and down and going through this journey is actually worth saving.