Saving A Dead Marriage

Should you still save your marriage? 

There are many countless reasons wives think it's not worth staying in the marriage anymore. Infidelity is one big reason. Others may cite unmet needs, husband works too much, he treats me like a househelp help, we have no respect for each other. Of course those are valid concerns. 

But the turning point is, would you still decide to try to save what seems to be a lifeless and broken marriage and say this is worth one more chance? Is it worth it?  

Honestly I've been in that situation, where it's just easier to rid yourself of all responsibility and throw in the towel. After all, he doesn't change. He doesn't seem to be sorry for what he's done. He doesn't put in as uch work on this relationship as I do. Why should I be a martyr and carry all the work in this marriage?

If you have watched Fireproof, a movie that portrays a husband trying to win the heart of his wife again after she intends to file for divorce, you know the message I'm trying to get across. The movie may sound cheesy to some, and maybe naive in some parts. But the point is this: That the marriage is a perfect symbol of God's love for us at the cross. We try to spurn his efforts and we reject him.But he chases us unceasingly. He loves us that much.

We were dead and hopeless ourselves. As sinners, we were sentenced to a life apart from God, and to be punished for our sins. What if God gave up on his 16th attempt to win us over and says, No, you've done enough wrong. You're a lost cause. Then where would we be? But thankfully, that will never be the case. God pursues us all the time, he looks past what we were and stakes his life on what we can become.

The same thing goes with my husband. I feel so humbled that God is gracious with me and my past, that I can't help but forgive, and forgive and forgive again. Who are we to say that we cannot forgive our spouses? If I would have to work on my marriage for 39 years for us to have a better marriage, I would do it without regret. Because that is the kind of love God wants me to have - without conditions. Nothing like, "If you do this, then I will change. If you're like that then I'll be like this." I married this man for life, and I will honor God with my promise until I face Him again one day, and I hope I hear Him say, "Well done, good and faithful servant."

Romans 6:11

In the same way, count yourselves dead to sin but alive to God in Christ Jesus.

Ephesians 2:1

As for you, you were dead in your transgressions and sins.

Colossians 2:13

When you were dead in your sins and in the uncircumcision of your flesh, God made you alive with Christ. He forgave us all our sins.